Whenever someone asks me how I’m doing, the first thing that comes out of my mouth is “highs and lows.” It’s the simple truth. I’ve had my share of really high moments – things that I may have taken for granted before, or rather, moments I may have not appreciated as much as I do now. Moments of such appreciation, they almost become overwhelming. Then there are those moments where fear, anxiety and sadness creep in and I feel like we’re living in some type of bad dream.
There are those moments where, along with the rest of us, I wonder when this will end?! What will our new normal look like? Last night, I was browsing through one of my local FB groups and the topic was “When do you think this social distancing order will end & when will schools reopen?” Of course, all of the answers were mere guesses, but browsing those type of posts always pull me into a low place. It’s the unknown of when, that is anxiety-inducing for all of us.
I worry about those with small children – how do we protect these innocent little souls who just want to go to playground, see their friends or simply get a slice of pizza or a donut. I worry about all of the small businesses who are not going to make it out of this. These thoughts tend to weigh me down, especially when I think about the mom & pop shops that as it is, are living paycheck-to-paycheck. Those that have put their entire life savings into their business and just like that, they may not survive. That part really kills me.
I get sad about our parents who miss their grandchildren. Sasha is growing up so quickly and at this point, one month is major and I know how much that kills them. I worry about my father who is over 80 years old (he had me in his 40’s) and living alone. My mother also lives alone, but for some reason, I worry less about her. She’s the type of woman who always tells me to “relax. everything is going to be okay..”
I also want to be 100% honest with you all. Quarantining with two small children, especially while trying to work-from-home is very hard! Like, really, really hard. Please don’t take this the wrong way. They’re truly the biggest blessing and majority of the time, I am so thankful that we’re getting to spend so much time together as a family. When I think about it, an opportunity we’ll probably never get again. They also make the day go by so quickly, even with my head spinning for a portion of it. Most days, Keith and I are so burned out from the day that we just want to collapse, but there’s really no time for that. When they’re asleep, it’s our time to get some work done without any distractions.
With all of the above being said, yesterday was a really great day. I spent most of the day hanging out with the kids while Keith worked on a new Netflix series in his basement studio (he’s an Audio Engineer). After a couple of hours, we all went into our backyard, poured some wine, listened to music and simply hung out while Sasha napped in her stroller. They were a series of such simple moments, but moments that made me feel so thankful. At one point, I just closed my eyes and thought “something good has to come out of all of this. Something good will come of this” Of course, there’s nothing good about all of the lives we’ve lost, all of the jobs, and what is going to happen to our economy, but beyond that, some deeper level of human connection. Something we’ve lost along the way for a society as a whole. I read this article the other day and it made me feel hopeful.
On instagram, I’ve been trying to use my platform to help out in whatever ways I can. Whether it’s connecting to some of you, donating a portion of my project earrings to City Harvest or donating my unopened beauty products to those on the frontlines – it all helps. If you don’t have a platform, that doesn’t matter. Any small gesture goes a long way. Helping an elderly person order groceries and dropping them off (if you’re able to) on their steps. Checking in on a single friend to see how they’re coping being alone. Donating whatever you can afford to a charity you’re passionate about. Anything.
As far as the content I put out, it will continue to be a mix. I want to provide a distraction in whatever ways I can. I realize many of you are not shopping or interested in knowing about my favorite beauty products that are getting me through and that’s okay. I’ve learned that it’s impossible to please everyone on a regular day, but especially during a crisis. If there’s anything you want to see more of or less of, of course, I would love to know.
So these are my high and low thoughts on everything going on. How about you? How are YOU feeling? What helps you get through the day? For those of you who’ve lost jobs or income, who are on the frontlines, who have small businesses, who’ve been impacted by the virus in any way, my heart goes out to you. It’s a tough time, but like all of you, I am praying when it’s over, we come out of it stronger.
No comments:
Post a Comment